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“I can be whatever I want, despite being bipolar,” says writer Bia Garbato


She had to look within and understand her condition to be the best version of herself. Today it demystifies bipolarity

‘Illness does not define me. I’m bipolar, but I’m also the mother of a brilliant 10 year old boy; a sometimes annoying wife, but a companion; a writer who has learned to expose her vulnerabilities. I can be whatever I want, despite being bipolar,” writes Bia Garbato in her book ‘Bipolar Yes, crazy only when I want’by Matrix Editor.

In a video interview with Stadium, says she never knew exactly what it was like to be normal. “I always knew there was something off here.” From the age of 16, Bia frequented the therapists’ rooms. He visited more than ten psychiatrists, but received only the life-changing diagnosis at the age of 31. “The diagnosis was a huge relief. I realized I had a disease that could be treated and I wasn’t crazy,” he says.

It all started with an episode of depression and panic disorder as a teenager. Bia told her parents that she was depressed and she soon entered therapy for treatment. “I had the feeling that no one knew what she was, no one understood me, but my father didn’t want his daughter to go to the psychiatrist, despite the fact that psychologists advised it,” she says.

Then, Bia started having episodes of depression throughout her life, which were in stark contrast to anyone who knew her. “My personality was upbeat, I’ve always been known as an outgoing and fun person,” she says.

That contrast, between deep sadness and intense euphoria, is exactly what the bipolar disorder, disease diagnosed in Bia at the age of 31. “At 26 I was diagnosed with depression and it took me another five years to be understood as bipolar, because it’s easy to seek help when you’re in pain. The hard thing is also realizing the need for that help in times of mania “, remember.

Mania is the name for the euphoric state in bipolar disorder characterized by decreased sleep, inflated self-esteem, overspending, and excessive talking. “Mania is the greatest happiness a person can have. You think you’re capable of anything. I, for one, was sure that I could cross any street with my eyes closed and no car would catch me.”

Prejudice with bipolar disorder

In the past, bipolar disorder was called manic-depressive disorder. Exactly the name that Bia and her parents heard in 2012. “When I heard that, I thought of the maniac in the park. And I don’t even like the word depressive, because I’m an ascendant person,” she says, despite the initial scare , understood that the condition is fraught with prejudice. “It’s very easy to talk about depression, but bipolarity, even in 2023, is still viewed in a strange way. Are you someone who keeps changing your mind? Do you have a double personality, two faces? as a synonym for crazy,” she comments.

Motivated to demystify the disease, Bia decided to write a book about her experience. “It helped me put all my vulnerabilities on the table. Before, I was afraid they wouldn’t hire me because of my illness. I thought, ‘Is my son’s playmate’s mother going to let him play here at my house?'” he admits. she. . “And today I know that, when I am treated, I am not crazy. I am a married woman, I have a child to take care of, I work, I have friends and family. I have a normal life.”

Maternity and bipolarity

Stability arrived in early 2020, thanks to the new doctor and the regimented routine he’s established: medications, therapy, daily exercise, eight hours of sleep, and cutting back on caffeinated and alcoholic beverages.

But first, she was faced with one of the biggest challenges she’s ever had: coping with pregnancy, while coping with illness. “I think the hardest part of being bipolar was being a bipolar mother,” she says.

In addition to the fear of a possible crisis, Bia had to stop taking anxiolytics and other prescription drugs that could harm the baby. In its place came homeopathy and herbal remedies. But she Bia has not stopped believing in herself, saying: “You will be the mom you can be”. “I used every bit of energy I had to take care of my son. I have always struggled to give what little I had for him and today is wonderful ”, she guarantees.

By looking inside, discovering her strength and facing the disease, Bia has managed to realize her greatest dream. “Before I was 12 I already dreamed of writing a book. When I saw it on the shelf, I wanted to buy a book to give to someone who has never stopped believing in me: girls under 12”.

Source: Terra

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