Gaslighting: 6 signs to know if you are a victim

Gaslighting: 6 signs to know if you are a victim


This type of manipulation causes a person to lose self-confidence.

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Gas lighting It is a subtle form of psychological violence against women, very common in abusive relationships. It involves trying to manipulate a person into doubting their emotions, thoughts or memories. The victim may be under so much pressure that they doubt their own sanity.

You gas lighter – those who practice gas lighting – They lie and manipulate to distort their sense of reality. Over time, this control tactic can erode trust to the point where a person no longer believes in their own instincts and feelings. According to mental health professionals, questioning reality is one of the most harmful things, because our reality and the way we think about the world is all we have.

Due to its subtle nature, the gas lighting it can be difficult to detect. But there are some warning signs. Here, experts highlight the warning signs for this form of emotional abuse:

1-Your memories are correct

Do you find yourself constantly starting sentences with “Oh, I thought you said…” only to then hear the other person tell you that you’re wrong? If they question your memory or make you question certain events or narratives, that’s a huge warning sign. Gas lighting It is often used to create confusion and hide wrongdoing, such as an extramarital affair or other types of abuse. It’s really about distorting your sense of reality, and that’s what’s so harmful.

2-The person denies the facts

A surefire way to tell you’re dealing with a gas lighter it’s whether he denies the facts that they both know to be true. He will flat out tell you that he never said or did anything, even if you were there to witness it. The goal is to make you question your perception of what happened. You might think, “Maybe I imagined they were saying that; or maybe I didn’t actually see it, I just thought I did.”

3-Your sanity is questioned

Another wake-up call: Do you often wonder if you’re too sensitive? One gas lighter will respond to your concerns by turning the problem around and suggesting that there is something wrong with you. The result is that you lose confidence in your own judgment. One gas lighter He may also attack your family and friends, calling them “crazy” or suggesting that they are conspiring to end the relationship. Your partner might say something like, “Is this another delusional idea of ​​your sister’s?” or they could involve the people you trust most.

4-Your problems are ignored

Another classic technique gas lighter is to completely stop communicating after expressing a concern. Instead of talking about problems in a healthy way, what they do is ignore them completely. You’ll be right in front of them, but they’ll act like you’re not even there. They will refuse to talk to you or give you an answer ghost (term used when someone mysteriously disappears as if they were a ghost). They might even say things like “are we really talking about this again?” or “I don’t have time for this,” to send a message that your feelings aren’t important.

5-Other people’s mistakes become yours

In a relationship with a gas lighter, “I’m sorry” isn’t a phrase you’ll hear often. But it will be something you say often, even when you haven’t done anything wrong. Gas lighter They want you to believe that you are the one who continually makes mistakes. If he’s late for dinner, for example, he might say it’s because you didn’t make the time clear. Gas lighter they have to be right about everything. Someone has to be wrong and that someone will be you.

6-You also hear ‘apologies’, but…

When the gas lighter saying they are sorry is usually inauthentic. Instead of apologizing for a mistake, they will apologize for their reaction to whatever they did. For example, they might say, “I’m sorry you were upset about that” or “I’m sorry you had a problem with what I did.” This allows them to shift the blame for what happened to their reaction; and, once again, you are the one who is wrong.

Do you identify with the situation?

If you suspect you are experiencing this, talk about your concerns with a third person, such as a friend or a nonjudgmental therapist. Going through your concerns with an outside person you trust can help you think more clearly and decide how to proceed. If the gas lighting is damaging your self-esteem or is in any way harmful to your mental health, it may be time to walk away. When your reality is questioned, used against you, or made to feel guilty about something someone else did, it’s usually a sign of extreme narcissism and is something you need to put a stop to.

Source: Health

Source: Terra

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