Some comments can affect a child more than you might think. Understand if there are any chances that this is happening out there and learn how to change your attitude
“This girl can’t stand to lose”, “she’s very shy”, “my son only takes 10”. At first glance, these phrases may seem like they have nothing in common, but there is a very important aspect that we need to pay attention to: the power they have to label children.
The habit can also be unconscious and certainly not have any derogatory intent. But often parents, family members and other adults who live with children make these kinds of comments without realizing the damage it can cause. “Children believe in their parents more than they believe in themselves. So when a mother or father says something about their child, it becomes a limiting truth. although often they are not, “explains parent educator Paloma Silveira Baumgart.” When she hears ‘Joana is shy, she is a wild animal’, Joana will probably grow up without being able to make many friends, because she thinks she is shy, “exemplifies him. specialist.
Likewise, that child referred to as “messy and disobedient,” the more he feels he “is” that way, the more he will repeat the behavior you want to change – as is clearly seen in classrooms.
It is known from neuroscience that the our early childhood shapes much of what we will become in the future. “Character, personality, trauma and many behavioral characteristics are formed based on what we live in this period, which goes from zero to 6 years”, warns Paloma. Therefore, it is essential to pay attention to what we say to children during this time, as the repercussions can resonate for the rest of their life.
Is only the negative label problematic?
Not. Although the negative etiquette reinforces bad behaviors and makes them come true, when they are just a reflection of a situation – the “positive” label, that is the one that reinforces a situation deemed appropriate, can also have negative consequences.
“For example, by saying ‘my son is a genius, he only takes 10’, you can make the child believe. When he takes 9, he will feel sad, because genes cannot get less than 10,” says the parent educator. This type of scenario tends to bring anxiety and a huge charge to the little one, also affecting his self-esteem.
But then what can we say?
Expert guide is change “è” to “è”. So, we are referring to behavior that is happening at that moment, without defining what that child is or is not.
“Maria is not angry, she is angry, because she wanted a chocolate before dinner” “Maria is shy, because she has just arrived, but she soon starts socializing”, comments Paloma with possible suggestions.
In case of positive labels, compliments and incentives are more than welcome, even following this logic of cause and effect . “Congratulations, son, you have 10, because you have studied!”. The important thing is that the little ones understand that they are nothing definitive and that everything can be transformed according to the choices they make during their life. Knowing this, the future will surely thank you!
Source: Terra
Benjamin Smith is a fashion journalist and author at Gossipify, known for his coverage of the latest fashion trends and industry insights. He writes about clothing, shoes, accessories, and runway shows, providing in-depth analysis and unique perspectives. He’s respected for his ability to spot emerging designers and trends, and for providing practical fashion advice to readers.
