The positive aspects of the masculinity that I discovered by making the transition as a trans man

The positive aspects of the masculinity that I discovered by making the transition as a trans man


Ash Pérez is a writing, producer and creator of content that has decided to make a series that told of his transition process as a trans person and the facets of masculinity.




For Ash Pérez, producer, writer and creator of content for 35 years, immersing himself in masculinity was like traveling through an unknown country with a different culture and language.

In 2020, after having lived openly as a person queer And since bisexual since he was 23, he started his physical transition to be a trans man.

Ash embraced his identity after losing his father during the Covid-19 pandemic. Although his father accepts his sexual and gender diversity, he says he is no longer “dad girl” was complicated.

“This was one of the reasons why I didn’t transmit before, I didn’t want my father to be disappointed. When he died, I saw the freedom to explore my genre,” he explains.

However, with the death of his father, Ash lost his only male reference. And in the middle of the transition, he realized that he needed support to enter a reality that was not aware.

“I didn’t think I know so little about masculinity and men in general, I felt like an extraterrestrial who learned another language,” he said in an interview with the BBC News Mundo – Spanish service to the BBC.

The ash was facing one of the social challenges common to trans people, which vary according to the individual context and, in some cases, intertwine with physical challenges related to hormonal therapy.



The production is transmitted by the platform of the 2nd attempt, created by the group of former employees of the Media Buzzfeed company

Although the procedure is safe, according to medical institutions such as the Mayo Clinic, hormonal therapy involves risks, such as the possibility of causing some diseases.

In the middle of this process, Ash has decided to resort to tools that have always helped him overcome the difficulties: laughter and writing.

After talking to a former colleague of Buzzfeed, He created a series of humorous videos in which he crossed daily situations together with other men.

In the production, which he called The new guy tries, And this transmitted two seasons from the streaming platform 2nd attemptHe does things like visiting a barber for the first time or playing poker with a group of friends.

In the program, he claims to have discovered that many of his preconceived ideas on masculinity were not entirely true and that even socially acquired beliefs can cause profound damage to men, as experts warned.

But the revelation he considers most important is that he found positive facets in masculinity, after feeling distrust and fear for years for hearing that he was “toxic” and “harmful”.

Learn to play

One of the positive aspects he discovered during the recording of the program was the role of game and sport.

According to him, some men use these activities to share their emotions, worries or difficult moments, even if this is not the main objective of the meeting.

“In the second episode, when we went to play poker, the conversation ended very deep. We ended up talking about the fears that paternity brings, as unprotected men felt in this phase and the concern that had to be a support for their partners,” he says.

“Sometimes you could watch a football match with your uncle, a friend and, in the middle of advertising, says something like:” You know, I lost my job. “This is different from how I learned to relate to others.”

He adds that in 31 he “socialized like a woman”, his meetings with friends were often concentrated only on speaking.

“We have always had a lot to do in court.”

And he believes that some men “have an extraordinary ability to play, play and have fun, something we are losing”.



Ash learned that some men often socialize through games and sports and are not used to direct conversations

Increase

Ash says that after his transition, he started exercising why before.

Before, he went to the gym with the idea of ​​losing the body mass and was afraid of gaining volume, because, according to the beauty standards they taught, it was something associated with masculinity.

“I think many women can benefit from strength training, that several studies indicate to be beneficial to health.”

And he adds: “For men, they teach how to increase their body, while for women, they teach it to decrease it”.

He also says he learned to be an adventurer.

In the series, he is excited to do some crazy things, such as participating in a competition in which they drag trucks with cars.

“Being adventurous is something I learned as a man, because when I grew up, I was told that women are fragile. And in a certain sense, due to this type of conviction, it is not possible to identify all the benefits that usually associate with masculinity,” he says.

“In the world in which we live, women sometimes cannot enjoy these benefits. But perhaps, on an individual level, there is something that can incorporate while larger changes are happening.”

Type

As “Trojan horse who helped her friends reflect on its kind,” said Ash, as he felt in the production of The new guy tries.

In the programs, men participated that, for years, they shared various stages of life together. And it was in the discussions they had during the series that the details were met each other.

“In recordings, they told me they were not aware of basic things like the fact that their friends had brothers. Even as they thought of certain topics, such as paternity or their fears,” he says.

According to him, the reason behind this is that there are no common areas to talk about masculinity and that many men are taught as a child to hide their emotions.

Ash, which is now an influencer on social networks, strengthens what experts and scientific research say, which show that in some countries like the United States and the United Kingdom, men tend to suffer more than solitude.



Ash finds important to encourage conversation on the genre among men

This constant disconnection is associated with a “greater risk of depression and anxiety”, according to the American surgeon’s office.

Ash states that while the patriarchal system benefits men, they can also be damaged by stereotypes and rules that this perpetual system.

Faced with solitude, some resort to platforms with online conversation forum, which often become bursts of radical ideas.

“Men are much more than we see at first sight. If we don’t start opening the dialogue and involving them in gender discussions, we are only isolating them.”

Although some governments around the world increase an adverse narrative against trans people – as in the United States with the government of Donald Trump, which claims that the genre should be defined on the basis of the sex of the person at birth – Ash believes that this community tries to maintain dialogue on the various human beings that we are.

“What we seek is to expand the limits of the genre,” he says.

And it guarantees: “We do this because there is much more freedom when crossing the other part”.

Source: Terra

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