The 20-year-old singer was interviewed by the BBC and said she is having a hard time coping with imposter syndrome and being in the spotlight.
Billie Eilish is the first artist born in the 21st century to reach the top of the Billboard chart. She and she the first to also win an Oscar. The 20-year-old told the BBC that she has struggled with imposter syndrome and that she likes to feel more masculine than feminine.
There are three hours until the start of a world tour show by Happier than ever 🇧🇷Happier than ever, in free translation), which took Billie Eilish to four continents over the course of seven months. The end of the international tour is in Perth in the far west of Australia. It will perform at the end of March next year in Brazil, as one of the main attractions in Lollapalooza.
A trapdoor will soon open and Billie will emerge from the back of the stage, as if emerging from an underground toaster oven, appearing crouched under white strobe lights. The crowd of 15,000 that fills the stadium will go wild.
For the next 90 minutes, she will captivate an audience composed mainly of young women born in this century, with her dreamlike, deep and fluid voice. She will traverse the stage with her toes and leap as if she were in a punk club, ending up squatting, with the grace of who she has been trained as a dancer since she was eight years old.
The show begins. And between songs, she talks to the audience like they’re her best friends, telling them she loves them.
“I was doing an interview earlier,” she says, as she lets her hair down in tight buns. “And I always said that when a new person comes into my life — anything romantic — you’re the first thing I mention…”
“Just so you all know: it’s in me.” And the crowd screams again.
Three hours before all this, Billie Eilish gives an interview to the BBC, talking about a career that is less than ten years old.
Billie Eilish Pirate Baird O’Connell was born and raised in Los Angeles to musician and actor parents who had supporting roles in shows such as Friends And The west wing🇧🇷 Billie studied at home with her brother and musical partner Finneas O’Connell. She had been writing songs since she was four years old.
One night in 2015, 14-year-old Billie posted the song online. eyes of the oceanwritten by Finneas, so that his dance teacher could hear the piece.
When she woke up, thousands had heard eyes of the ocean🇧🇷 A record deal and a series of uncomfortable encounters with older men soon followed.
“I look back fondly most of the time, but, you know, it was quite fun a 14-year-old girl with her 17-year-old brother in hundreds of meetings at any given time,” Billie tells the BBC.
“There were a lot of encounters with people who didn’t know how to talk to 14-year-old girls.”
the center of attention
As Billie’s fame exploded, so did her social media following. Currently with 100 million on Instagram and over 60 million on TikTok, any post from Billie Eilish generates a whirlwind of comments. She says she’s well aware of the toxic potential of comment sections, so it’s scary for her to be the topic of millions of conversations.
“I grew up on the internet. I saw everyone in the public eye, and suddenly I was in the spotlight. And then it was like, ‘Oh, now I’m the order of the day, not just participating in the comments, which is really weird.” he says.
“And when you see yourself and your name everywhere, it’s really hard to know who the hell you are.”
The worldwide fame has aroused the interest of several major media outlets. Commenting on both trivialities and more serious and personal matters – his moments of depression and suicidal thoughts – means having his speeches analyzed with a magnifying glass.
It’s hard having to justify things you said as a teenager, says Billie.
“It’s very difficult to develop and modify, for many reasons,” Billie says.
“I recently dealt with very strong imposter syndrome. I have dealt with it so many times in my life and sometimes in the last year and the year before I went into a negative spiral within imposter syndrome that I I’m holding on to what I could, I feel like myself again.”
It’s nearly impossible to imagine how someone so young has managed to handle the spotlight and the weight of strangers’ expectations.
The June 2021 issue of British Vogue featured the then 19-year-old singer in a skintight satin corset dress, in a look very different from the baggy, genderless dresses she was synonymous with. The cover generated comments not only from the internet, but also from The New York Times, which listed the criticisms of the new look.
Billie says she doesn’t feel the need to just show a version of herself, even though she feels more empowered when she feels “masculine.”
“I feel most empowered when I feel masculine in my life, and I can also find power in femininity — it’s kind of a balance between the two,” she says.
“I like to feel more masculine than feminine, it makes me feel better. But it’s been something that has been difficult for me for a long time. There are times when you can have it and it’s still cool. Now I’m wearing a more fitted shirt and a bigger neckline, and the old me was like, “Ew, please don’t!”.
“But I like it, it feels good now, and it’s just the balance of the two.”
Billie’s favorite composition, Your power (“Your power”, in literal translation), with lyrics like “maybe you don’t want to lose your power, but it feels so strange to have it” led to a particularly electrifying moment on the tour’s final night in Perth, when dozens of young they held placards saying “thank you” as he sang the ballad.
The plaques were made by 19-year-old Australian Alyssah Campbell, who distributed them to fans. For Alyssah, the song is about a time in her life where she has been dealing with trauma.
🇧🇷Your power it’s a song that almost anyone can relate to,” she tells the BBC. “When I hear this song, I think of the man who abused his power when he was with me, how much trauma he caused me, physically and emotionally.”
Billie says the song is about a lot of people she’s met and struggled with.
“It’s really hard to have a lot of power, in general,” she says. “It’s hard to have power and it’s really hard when you have nothing and suddenly you have a lot of power. It’s hard not to take advantage of it and abuse it. Other than what the song is about, this goes for everything in life.”
There’s a moment in your Apple TV documentary, The world is a bit blurry (“O Mundo Appears a Little Blurred”, in free translation), in which Katy Perry shortly before taking the stage at Coachella in 2019 says that Billie can call her whenever she wants to talk about the pressures she suffers as an artist.
Billie says she hasn’t called Perry yet.
“I should call her. I didn’t believe her at the time. It was pretty crazy. I couldn’t imagine it being even crazier.”
Billie says it’s impossible to describe to other people what it’s like to be so famous. “It’s like trying to explain a color that doesn’t exist.”
* Billie Eilish is on this year’s list BBC 100 Womenin 100 womanAndIt is inspiring and influential worldwide. Follow BBC 100 Women on Instagram🇧🇷 Facebook And Twitter (in English).
– This text was published at https://www.bbc.com/portuguese/geral-63867947
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Camila Luna is a writer at Gossipify, where she covers the latest movies and television series. With a passion for all things entertainment, Camila brings her unique perspective to her writing and offers readers an inside look at the industry. Camila is a graduate from the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) with a degree in English and is also a avid movie watcher.
