“I’m still afraid”: Claire Holt told how her pregnancy is going after a miscarriage

The Vampire Diaries star, 34-year-old Claire Holt, declassified her interesting position a week ago from the red carpet of the Cannes Film Festival. And on the eve of her blog, she shared the details of the exciting expectation. Holt, who, along with her husband, real estate manager Andrew Joblon is raising two children, admitted that she was surprised to see a positive pregnancy test result in March of this year.

I had this irresistible desire to have offspring, and I really felt that the child would come to us. I don’t know if it was maternal intuition or wishful thinking, but I had a very strong premonition. Although I knew it was possible when those two pink lines appeared, I experienced a whole range of emotions,” she shared.

Instead of joy, however, quickly came a feeling of intense anxiety. The fact is that five years ago, in 2018, the actress lost her baby – her first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. But even after the birth of two healthy babies, she still worries that the tragedy could happen again.

Every day I did a few tests to make sure the line was getting darker. My Google searches turned to miscarriage statistics and signs of loss,” Holt wrote. “I often wonder what it’s like to get through a pregnancy without worrying about something taking your baby away from you… I thought that after two healthy pregnancies, I might feel a little more confident, but alas, the feeling was the same. I never allow myself to worry too much, as if that would somehow protect me from pain if something goes wrong.

Claire remembered going to the ultrasound and worrying about finding the baby’s heartbeat.

I tried to come to terms with the fact that everything would happen exactly the way it was supposed to happen. Nothing was under my control. I reminded myself that if I hadn’t lost my first child, I wouldn’t have had my children, James or Elle. It definitely helped me curb the constant whirlpool of negative thoughts in my head.

Holt said that now she feels much better – both mentally and physically.

Although I still have moments of nausea, this is completely manageable and my energy is back to pre-pregnancy levels. Of course, I’m still afraid. I know so many things can happen between today and week 40. However, I will not let these fears deprive me of my joy,” the actress summed up.