Janet Drake, a 53-year-old mother of two from west London, says starting holiday flings abroad revived her sex life following her divorce 18 months ago.
Writing under a pseudonym, Drake explained that her long marriage was unhappy before the split, describing both herself and her former husband as "sleepwalking through life." She had long suspected him of having affairs, which ultimately served as the catalyst for ending their marriage.
Her former husband now lives with a woman he met during a work trip outside the United Kingdom. Drake said learning that he enjoyed sleeping with people while abroad inspired her to adopt a similar approach to her single life.
Drake, who has sons aged 15 and 18, said warm weather and long afternoons abroad put her in a relaxed state of mind. She stated that sunshine makes her feel free and far more interested in intimacy than she feels at home.
Recalling her youth, Drake remembered traveling to Spain with a friend's family as a teenager and falling hard for strangers. She said those feelings were forgotten for years under "a mass of laundry, football boots, and school WhatsApp groups."
She also recalled watching her mother and friends giggle at the film Shirley Valentine, which depicts a bored British housewife having a romance on a Greek island. Drake added that holiday flings are simpler than local one-night stands because there are no emotional ties and "you know you're not going to bump into him in Waitrose."
First Solo Trip to Barcelona
Drake's new dating strategy began eight months ago during a solo weekend trip to Barcelona. Acting on advice from a divorced friend, she downloaded the Tinder app for the first time and set her location to Barcelona while sitting by a hotel rooftop pool.
Although she was initially curious rather than intent on hooking up, she quickly matched with a slightly younger man. Despite feeling nervous and out of practice, Drake said he put her at ease straight away and cracked jokes over tapas.
Since that initial encounter, Drake has taken two additional long weekend trips to Europe to meet partners. She sets her dating app age criteria to men between 35 and 55.
Romance in Florence and Palma
Four months ago, Drake traveled to Florence for a long weekend and hooked up with a Spanish man in his 30s. After chatting and sharing drinks at a bar, they went up to her room, where he gave her a steady stream of compliments.
According to Drake, he repeatedly told her, "You're so beautiful," and added, "I love the way you look, I can't believe you want me." She admitted to making a big effort beforehand by waxing, noting that the experience was worth it.
Drake contrasted the encounter with her marriage, stating her former husband never paid her compliments and instead made her feel like she had to service his needs during sex she described as "abysmal."
Her most recent trip took her to Palma with girlfriends, where she met an Italian man in his early 40s whom she described as looking like "an older Harry Styles." After spotting each other in the hotel restaurant, she approached him at the bar and asked, "Do you fancy a drink later?"
The next day, one of her traveling companions offered a critical perspective, telling Drake, "He obviously comes to the hotel to find women to sleep with." Drake dismissed the remark, stating she was at the hotel doing the exact same thing.
Safety Precautions and Dating Views
Drake maintains strict safety measures for her casual encounters, always insisting that partners use a condom. She also prefers meeting men in hotel settings rather than at her home or theirs.
She avoids dating near her home in west London because she fears encountering acquaintances on local apps. Furthermore, she expressed little interest in British men on domestic dating apps, quoting a single friend who described them as "out of shape, beaten down by life and bitter about their exes."
Having slept with two Spanish men and one Italian man so far, Drake claimed that men in Southern Europe are more adventurous, open-minded, and generous lovers. She added that they do not view women in their 50s as being "over the hill."
Upon returning to the UK, Drake said she does not pine for her partners or expect the relationships to continue. She noted that she enjoys her independence, cooking her own meals, watching her own television, focusing on work, and spending time with her sons.
To feel attractive and confident, Drake works out with weights at the gym, maintains a curvy size 12 figure, and wears lingerie. She concluded that her holiday flings have taught her that she is a "powerful, sensual female," remarking, "Just call me Shirley."
