I Led My Daughter on a Leash: The Story of Russia’s Smallest Mother

At the age of three, Valeria was diagnosed with a rare genetic disease that causes incorrect formation of bone tissue – spondyloepiphyseal dysplasia. When the girl was 13 years old, her height froze at about 109 centimeters, and her legs began to deform.

Parents never called her disabled, and Valeria remembers that she was no different from other children: she also ran on playgrounds, climbed horizontal bars, tobogganed and rode bicycles. Or maybe it was different – the girl says that when they meet, childhood friends say: “Don’t you remember? You were our leader. A real boss!

The parents hoped that the disease could be overcome, but the doctors refused the operation: they explained that the child had not yet stopped growing and that after the operation there could be problems with the bone. They also refused hormone injections, saying that the girl was already producing enough. The family hoped something would change when Lera turned 18, but their hopes did not come true.

After reaching adulthood, the girl knocked out a quota and went to Kurgan, to Academician Ilizarov’s medical center for traumatology and orthopedics, where serious bone pathologies are treated. The doctors’ verdict was disappointing: it was too late for the operation, it would have helped in six months. Now, the doctors explained, you can straighten your legs, but you will have to pay for aesthetics – Valeria will have to walk on crutches for the rest of her life. The girl refused.

“Not like that” Lera began to feel at the age of 13-14, when it became clear that other girls date boys, while boys consider Valeria a friend and “their boyfriend” . Somehow she couldn’t even stand it and complained to her friend: they say everyone goes in pairs and I’m alone. In response, I heard, “Ler, well, you’re like that, what can you do now, kind of live with that.”

The girl was upset and her parents noticed. My dad told me not to “breastfeed” – surprisingly the advice helped. For herself, Lera firmly decided that she would have a family and continued to live, as before. Studied, did household chores. If she painted or dressed beautifully, then only for herself, and not in the hope that guys would pay attention to her. And at the age of 18, that’s exactly what happened: the man started looking in his direction.

Together with her husband Dmitry, who lived in Yekaterinburg, the girl met in a group of disabled people, where she was looking for friends. At first she didn’t take him seriously, but after six months of correspondence she realized she was in love. Dima called to visit, but she refused, explaining: to go far from the Rostov region, tickets are expensive. But the guy was serious and said he will solve this problem. And a few days later, a confused mother came into the girls’ room: “Lera, here is a translation for you from some Dmitry …”

At first, dad dissuaded his daughter: he had nothing against Dima, but he was afraid that something would happen to Leroy on the train. Even at the station, before departure, he asked, “Ler, maybe you’ll change your mind?” But my mother immediately said she wouldn’t object: “I won’t let you in now, and then you’ll blame me all your life for something that didn’t work out for you. So go ahead, fill in the bumps, you’re already a big girl, good luck to you.

Valeria stayed in Yekaterinburg for three weeks. Dima invited her to stay permanently, her mother did not care. The girl’s parents also agreed. After returning home to Gukovo to complete all the necessary paperwork, in May 2013 Valeria finally moved to Yekaterinburg. In 2015, she and Dima got married.

The doctors dissuaded Valeria from becoming a mother: they were afraid that she would have to lie down for the nine months. However, the girl says that until the last day she “ran like a savraska” and did the same things as before. “I thought I wouldn’t see myself because of my belly, but I had a very small belly, completely natural,” Valeria explains.

It was not always lucky for competent doctors: once, a Uzist woman said that Lera would have a dwarf. Frightened spouses rushed to geneticists for advice, and they assured that the child would be completely normal. There were a few incidents in the maternity ward: the caesarean section went well, but Valeria did not reach the high cradles and therefore could not take care of her daughter. The young mother suggested that an empty bed be placed next to her in the room, and a removable cradle from the cradle above her, but she was refused: this is not allowed!

They tried to send the girl to the ward for premature babies, but the employees working there were already indignant: there are children for whom you need an eye and an eye, and you are slipping us a healthy baby! So it all ended with what Lera suggested: another bed in the room, on which there was a cradle.

At first, Evangelina was an ideal child: she weighed a little, did not act, did not spin. However, when she began to grow up, it became more difficult to cope with her daughter: the baby simply did not understand that her mother could not walk as fast and as long as her. Valeria had to lead her on a harness, otherwise the girl might run away so that the whole yard would have to catch up. Not without ridicule: “Does she bite you?

For the first time, Lera drove her daughter to kindergarten with apprehension: she was worried about how the children would react to her. At first, the girl really attracted attention, but after two weeks everyone got used to it: “Now I’m coming – everyone just says: Eva’s mother has come, Eva’s mother has come. ‘Eve, hello.’

In the house, says Valeria, her husband has redone everything he could for her: the switches are installed lower, all the family members try not to put the necessary things up high. To reach the sink or the stove, you have to kneel on a stool, and to take a book from the top shelf, climb on a stepladder.

But if Valeria feels comfortable in the house, serious difficulties begin outside. There are high shelves everywhere: the staff of clinics and banks simply do not notice Valeria. Previously, in hospitals, she asked for help from other people queuing at the registry office, now she immediately goes to the office: “I knock and open it cheekily, because otherwise I won’t won’t make it. Of course, they don’t kick me out.”

It also happens the other way around: sometimes Valeria herself at the stops does not notice the sellers in the stalls behind the high racks, and stands for a long time, waiting for their arrival, while they in turn think that the woman is looking out the window while waiting for the tram.

“When I travel alone, I can always dodge and jump on a bus or a tram. And if I go with my daughter, it’s very difficult for me, she’s still small and can’t lift her legs so high. If the tram or the bus is low-floor, it’s easier, first I throw it, then I “throw”. And so ordinary – it’s hard. But there are very good people in Yekaterinburg, they will always help, they will pick up my daughter and lift her up, or I will ask the driver to help lower her,” says Valeria.

Worse is the situation at work: Valeria is not taken anywhere, even when it comes to the simplest tasks such as printing photos or accounting for phones returned for repair. They apologize for its size: we have a large counter, we won’t see you. Sometimes they say directly, “What kind of worker are you!”

For a while, the girl participated in focus groups, testing different products: she had to take, for example, a cream for three days, and then talk about her impressions. They did not see Valeria live, but once someone talked about her height, Kozhemyako was excluded from the group members: they say that you have health contraindications.

In February 2021, on her Instagram (the social network was recognized as extremist and banned in the territory of the Russian Federation), Valeria said that she was interested in manicure during quarantine: she d first for herself and her mother-in-law, then for her friends and acquaintances. She did it just for fun, but in January she came across classes with a good price and not far from home, and now she’s a certified manicurist and will be working from home.

In March 2020, Valeria told Yekaterinburg Online that she was most afraid of losing her legs: the pain in them had intensified lately. The doctors shrug their shoulders and say that the girl is already in the last stages of bone destruction and nothing can be done about it.

However, Lera doesn’t consider their words to be a sentence. A long time ago, at the age of 18, when she sat on the Commission for Medical and Labor Expertise, which is in the process of being disabled, she was told: you still look like be four years old, and then get ready for a wheelchair. But she is still standing and even carried a child on it. She does not like pain, but she is sure that the medicine does not stop, and perhaps this problem will soon be dealt with.

Valeria considers her family to be her main achievement. “I still became a mother. Many call it heroism, but I don’t see anything out of the ordinary. I hope that by my own example I will prove that anything is possible,” she says.

Photo: social networks