Love bombing: what it is, what the signs are and how to get out of it

This love bombing makes you feel good about yourself and your future with your partner

Your new relationship unfolds like a fairy tale as your partner showers you with gifts, compliments, affection, and promises of a future together. Then, suddenly, everything changes. Where your partner was once attentive and caring, he or she is now distant, cold, and even mean. And you wonder if their feelings were genuine. How do you identify the love bombing in a relationship? At first you can’t.

What is that love bombing?

Love bombing (or love bombing, in the free translation) is a method of emotional manipulation that often signals the start of an unhealthy, toxic or abusive relationship. Someone who uses this tactic often does so to quickly gain advantage of a potential partner so they can control him or her more quickly and easily. Those who “love to bombard” potential partners often display narcissistic traits.

These people usually have the following attributes:

Worry about your own wants and needs.

Have a sense of arrogance and superiority.

Show impatience towards people and situations that you consider unimportant.

Manipulating and gaslighting (making others doubt themselves) to get what they want.

This love bombing makes you feel good about yourself, your relationship, and your future with your partner, who uses this phase – usually early in the relationship – to break down your defenses and find ways to exercise control over the relationship, ultimately exercising control over you.

What are the signs of love bombing?

If you are being “bombed,” the signs may be more obvious to others than to you. This is because, at this stage, you feel special, understood and seen by your partner. Meanwhile, friends and family may worry that your new love interest is moving too quickly or acting obsessively. Examples of love bombing:

-Your partner seems too good to be true. He might tell you that he has been waiting for you all his life, that you are his soulmate or that he fell in love with you shortly after you met.

-Seems to share all your interests or agree with all your opinions.

-Wants to maintain constant communication with you.

-May become irrationally jealous when you want to spend more time with other people (even family).

-May make grand gestures or buy overpriced gifts early in the relationship.

A more hidden sign is what comes next: devaluation. When a partner in love begins a relationship, she may become bored, irritable and moody. He may insult you, belittle you, or even physically abuse you. If this happens, you can try to leave. At this point she activates the spell, starting the love bombing phase again to win him back.

Love bombing Is this a type of abuse?

Emotional abuse leaves you humiliated, insulted, scared, and insecure about your perception of events. If your partner intends to make you feel this way, it is abuse. Check out the differences between showing love and using love bombs to gain control:

-Show love. Some people are more open and expressive with their affection than others. The following signals may be exaggerated expressions of love, but they are not warning signs because they are not intended to control your partner.

-Incense a partner with compliments or gifts at the beginning of a relationship.

-Talking about your appearance, talents, or personality to yourself or other people.

-I want to talk to you or meet you all the time.

The line between honest and overzealous expressions of love and love bombing it’s not always clear. Below are some examples of “love bombing” designed to gain control over a partner:

-Require time, affection and loyalty from your partner before a solid relationship is established.

-Claim that you are his soulmate and refuse to let him spend time with other people – or act jealous when this happens.

-He says he knows you better than you know yourself.

The cycle love bombing

If you are trapped in a relationship characterized by such cycles of abuse, you may find it extremely difficult to escape. You may see your partner’s true colors once the love bombing phase is over, but just when you’re packing up to leave, they start apologizing, praising you, and talking about how perfect you are for them again. In short, the cycle is starting again.

If you decide to forgive him and stay, you could be trapped cycle of love bombing. All relationships have their ups and downs, and many healthy couples argue multiple times a day. However, emotional manipulation is significantly different. Healthy relationships are based on trust, respect and love. Love bombing – and the cycle that often follows it – is not love.

What are the strategies to address

It can be distressing to notice signs of manipulative or abusive behavior in your partner. In this situation you have three options:

-Stay in the relationship: Being with someone who relies more on manipulation than honest communication is a difficult option. If you decide to do nothing, the cycle of love bombing, belittling, and trying to win him back if he threatens to leave will likely continue.

-Exit the relationship: Only you can decide whether it is in your best interest to leave a relationship. Talk to a close friend, a trusted family member, or a psychologist or psychiatrist with whom you have experience working love bombing in relationships. Experts advise against attending relationship counseling with your partner if he is emotionally abusive.

-Give a limit to your partner: Your partner may be using toxic communication tactics because they grew up in an environment where love bombing or a lack of healthy boundaries were common. However, don’t let your partner use a difficult childhood as an excuse to engage in toxic behaviors. Ask him to stop this behavior and encourage him to seek help if necessary.

Communicate clearly how you feel and use sentences that begin with “I” to minimize the likelihood of the conversation turning into an argument. Let your partner know that you simply will not tolerate the cycle of love bombing, and be prepared to leave the conversation, room, or relationship if he or she violates a boundary you have established.

Love bombing is a sign of a more serious underlying problem in a romantic relationship. Does the way your partner treats you follow this pattern? If so, you should consider whether this relationship is improving your life. Maybe it’s time to move on to a healthier, more fulfilling relationship where both partners are able to communicate without resorting to manipulation.

Source: WebMD

Source: Terra

Ben

Ben Stock is a lifestyle journalist and author at Gossipify. He writes about topics such as health, wellness, travel, food and home decor. He provides practical advice and inspiration to improve well-being, keeps readers up to date with latest lifestyle news and trends, known for his engaging writing style, in-depth analysis and unique perspectives.