What women really want (in bed)

What women really want (in bed)

He, trembling with impatience, unbuttons her dress with strong but gentle hands and throws it on the bed, followed by several hours of stormy caresses… In fact, if perfect sex looks like this, then it definitely isn’t. not in women’s dreams. What do we really want in bed, and why do we shiver nervously (not passionately), opening big bottomless cornflower blue eyes?

Of course, everyone has their own understanding of ideal sex – at different times in life and in relationships (and this great wisdom applies not only to sex). But in general, psychology, physiology and common sense, with their last strengths, resist the clichés of movies and books, because they generally have nothing to do with reality.

Stereotype: the best sex is long sex

Literally five minutes later I want to add the epithet “tortuous” to the word “long”, and after another five – “meaningless” and “ruthless”. If sex is what experts call friction, the ideal timing is quite short, two to five minutes. After that, the rubbing becomes awkward in every way and painful, especially without the additional use of lubricants, and the only thought running through my head is let’s go faster. The lucky woman will certainly not tell her friends about it with aspiration, except perhaps to the gynecologist, from whom she will come to get anti-inflammatory suppositories. In general, the verdict is simple: a few minutes are enough, we are ready to take the rest of the time with prelude and compliments.

Stereotype: pressure and suddenness – what everyone dreams of

This story is about breakfast in bed. Not bad in theory – you wake up and there’s hot coffee and croissants on the tray. In practice, most people in the first minutes after waking up do not want to eat at all and prefer to have breakfast after washing and brushing their teeth.

If the pressure and passion was preceded by a date, long conversations or passionate looks, if you feel attractive and satisfied with your appearance, the expected surprise may not be so bad. But certainly not when you’re turning cutlets over the fire in a cloud of onion flavor or carefully planning your finances for a month.

In general, to get aroused, women usually need a lot more time and, if possible, a minimum of distractions, so that nothing prevents them from focusing on their own feelings and not thinking about whiten the ceiling. So all the little things that can draw attention to themselves, if possible, should be taken into account and neutralized.

Stereotype: the more orgasms the better

When a man doesn’t give a damn whether you’ve had an orgasm, that’s too bad. But the other extreme, when an orgasm is expected and literally demanded, is no better. Especially if they are waiting for the “correct”, i.e. vaginal and not clitoral orgasm – in the movies this always happens after friction, and it doesn’t matter that in practice this happens extremely rarely and either directly linked to the same clitoris.

Everyone’s physiology is different: some easily reach several orgasms in a minute, others need a long preparation and attitude beforehand, and others generally masturbate exclusively. And there’s nothing worse when a certain reaction is literally forced upon you, and if you don’t receive it, your efforts are redoubled. After all, this is not a Mario game, where the more you butt your head, the more coins you get.

Stereotype: If he can’t contain his passion, so much the better

Frankly, when. Fatigue and chronic lack of sleep, resentment, ill health are disgusting aphrodisiacs. Only the so-called tactile fatigue worsens, it is also “affected”, characteristic of mothers of young children sitting next to them on maternity leave. The need to be constantly and closely in contact with a child who every minute hugs you, pulls your hand or pulls your hair, makes all contact boring. In such cases, a state close to orgasm causes rest and helps to solve problems, and not at all a warm “I can’t wait another minute, you are so beautiful, give yourself to me, beautiful.” Feed, drink and lie down – better

Stereotype: Women secretly love dirty talk

And they probably like coffee, the smell of citrus fruits and the color green – but not all of them. And if there was no request to be called bad, bad girl, only three times as short and four times as rude, then you generally don’t want to listen to a list of words written about garages. As well as, and lines to the “hot cowboy Joe came to little Mary.” Intimate vocabulary generally requires caution and moderation – at least until there are guarantees that rough physiological descriptions or widespread Oriental euphemisms are what you need at the moment.

Stereotype: the main thing is the active stimulation of the erogenous zones

Most men are inherently phallocentric, so finding erogenous zones is usually not a problem. Of course, some unexpected discoveries can be made, but if you act directly and obviously, you won’t go wrong. In women, the largest organ, namely the skin, is considered the erogenous zone, and not only in the neck or chest, but, for example, on the feet or palms. With the right approach, it can be brought to boiling point with kissing or touching alone, but rough, focused attention to the nipples or clitoris often leads to the opposite result.

By the way, the concept that the main erogenous zone of a woman is the brain also raises questions. No, of course, the right words and the right compliments help to create the right atmosphere, but with a complete lack of technology and a misunderstanding of the words “I don’t like it that much”, they do not save. Yes, all this may sound complicated – but the desire that it does not scare and cause a lazy “oh, okay, I know myself” can certainly be added to the list of the most important.

Source: The Voice Mag

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