Therapeutic hugs: how touching and caressing affect our health

There are many obvious reasons why we enjoy being touched, hugged and kissed by those we love, whether in a romantic, friendly or familial sense. But it turns out that science also agrees: the social wall-wall-wall with parents and friends is not only necessary, but also important. They have a very significant impact on our health and well-being.

Without realizing it, we give many meanings to touch and caress. We seek understanding and acceptance, we want to express tenderness or joy. It is customary for different nations to express their feelings in different ways, but the essence of all traditions is the same – a special closeness. Even the primates, our distant relatives, can be seen touching each other familiarly: they gently stroke the paws of those they love, touch their fingers to each other’s faces, and sometimes kiss!

Why? Today, it has become unacceptable for adults to touch each other, innocent touching between celebrities is immediately declared sexualized by the media, and even simple hugs between friends are done less and less. Women are a little easier in a world of scarcity of touch, but toxic masculinity forbids poor men anything closer than a handshake or a rude pat on the shoulder. There is even an opinion that the downside of toxic masculinity – the demand for hypersexualized social behavior – is based on the need for human contact and closeness.

Of course, you should not touch other people without their permission and consent. If you are not familiar enough, it will be a direct violation of other people’s personal boundaries and there will be nothing useful in such contact. This also applies to children who are literally shaken by those who want to cuddle them gently without asking permission from the child himself.

Finnish scientists have noticed that the degree of pleasure from touch directly depends on the context.

In itself, a hug does not have a positive effect on our emotional state. And we certainly believe the Finns – they are known for their restraint when it comes to social interactions with strangers. Melting a northerner’s heart isn’t that easy.

But at the same time, a lot of research confirms the importance of touch in conveying emotions and strengthening existing relationships.

In research, scientists have repeatedly shown that babies (both human and primate babies) who are raised without touching, who are not hugged or cuddled by their mothers and loved ones, grow up traumatized and deprived of essential social skills. The so-called hospital syndrome leads not only to physical disorders, but also to insufficient development of higher nervous activity.

They can be called both an index and a catalyst. We offer empathy and sympathy, but at the level of the brain things are more complicated. When you touch someone nice (or receive a gentle touch from them), the brain begins to blaze like a Christmas tree – the areas responsible for forming complex thoughts, emotional reactions and physiological responses light up strongly.

Brain scans show that a soft, pleasant touch activates the orbitofrontal cortex. It is located behind the prefrontal cortex and is traditionally associated with learning, decision-making, and appropriate social and emotional responses.

Some scientists go further and advance the audacious theory that romantic kisses are one of the main parameters by which we choose partners.

Experts believe that the unique chemical “cocktail” found in each person’s saliva can transmit important information to our brain, which in a second renders a verdict on how we are physiologically adapting. These assumptions have no concrete basis, but the concept itself seems fantastic. You just kiss, and the brain, a real supercomputer, has already calculated everything and made a plan for prepayment of a joint mortgage.

But he will step back from romance for the time being. The touches are very different, and sometimes they are designed to calm those who are feeling bad. They signal that we are close and sympathetic (that is, we express our willingness to share emotions and take some of the burden of feelings onto ourselves).

Swedish scientists have found scientific justification for what mankind has done hundreds of thousands, even before we mastered articulate speech. They confirmed that hugging and stroking children when they feel bad or scared helps babies calm down.

A child who cannot cope with the emotions, at the moment of the hug, feels that he is not alone. He has someone to rely on, a big strong adult will be there to protect him from adversity.

Young children do not understand the difference between a real threat and an imagined threat, they experience fear, depression and a real threat to life. Therefore, it is extremely important to make children understand that they will be protected from any danger and that they will not be left alone to survive.

Of course, it is not always about actual survival – only about the strength of the emotional reaction that appears in the child. Children calm down easily and quickly in hugs or become inconsolable when covered with feelings of anxiety.

Emotional support is, of course, extremely important. What about direct health benefits? Are there any hidden bonuses in the hug?

It turns out there is. A 2014 study showed that long-term positive hugs protect us from respiratory infections.

And for those who got sick, the emotional support of strong hugs allowed them to fight off the virus that had already entered the body faster and more effectively. True, it is not too clear how to hug so that the second person does not get infected. Is it in a full chemical protective suit?

Statistics clearly indicate that in relationships where partners hug and caress each other (even without a sexual connotation), women generally have fewer blood pressure problems and fewer risks for the cardiovascular system. It turns out that hugs are good for the heart, not only in the figurative sense, but also in the most direct sense.

But the kiss works for the benefit of immunity. By kissing on the lips, we transfer up to 80 million bacteria in 5-10 seconds. It sounds pretty nasty, but it’s very, very helpful: microbiome sharing works almost like a vaccine. This process introduces our immune system to someone else’s, makes our defenses work much more actively and arms us against more and more pathogens under “peaceful” conditions.

It’s true: touch helps relieve or relieve pain – we all know the pleasure of massaging or scratching our backs. But in order to achieve an analgesic effect, it is not at all necessary to make an appointment with a massage therapist or to annoy loved ones to do “rails-rails, sleepers-sleepers”.

It turns out that even the usual touching from loved ones seems to “take away” some of the pain we feel. At least that’s how our brain perceives it. After childbirth – a severe stress on the body – many women have noted that it is much easier for them to be able to shake hands with their partner during labor. Yes, there may be bruising on the palms, but that’s nothing compared to the feelings of women coming out of a brand new baby.