How to learn to gossip: useful tips

Psychologists advise: when you go to a new company, it is important to realize internally that you are going to have a good time. Imagine how great the evening will be, how interesting it will be to meet new people… And stop telling yourself that you will be shy again and won’t say two words out of excitement, otherwise it will be like this .

Clothing also plays an important role. It’s not about brands and fashion trends, but about personal feelings. Okay, you can feel like a millionaire in your favorite jeans and a cheap but perfectly fitted jacket and suffer from complexes in a stunning evening dress. Just because you often wear jeans (and you know for sure that they emphasize your assets), but this is the first time you put on a dress of this cut, so you constantly adjust the thin straps and look aside your own neckline. – is it too deep? What informal conversations there are! When you receive a party invitation, check your dress code in advance. So that it doesn’t turn out like that episode of the movie “Bridget Jones’s Diary” where the main character arrived at a family lunch in a playful Playboy bunny costume, while all the guests paraded around in cocktail attire.

​​​​​​​Psychologists give the following advice to all shy people: try to look your interlocutor in the eyes (or at least the bridge of the nose) when communicating. This is how you can hide your enthusiasm and uncertainty. By looking away to the side or to the ground, you will at best betray your true feelings. In the worst case, the interlocutor will decide that you are bored with the conversation and will try to retreat.

At a party, don’t stay in one place. Also, don’t take a defensive position at the buffet table! Even if you don’t know anyone here, look around the room. Greet other guests. And above all, don’t forget to smile.

Finally, another universal tip. Hold a glass of fruit juice or mineral water in your hands. This way you will keep your hands busy and, in the conversation, you will be able to “wash away” the pause that has occurred. Besides, this is why it is better to opt for non-alcoholic drinks – what if there are several breaks?

If you’re attending a private party, ask the host to introduce you to the other guests. Be careful! During the meeting, not only their names will be heard, but also their personal details. They are the ones who will allow you to start a conversation. With one of the guests you could be born in the same city, with another you could study in the same institute, with a third you could be passionate about the same thing…

If you are invited to a formal presentation among many guests, it is unlikely that anyone will be kind enough to introduce you to everyone. This means you will have to act on your own. You can choose the “start with a compliment” tactic. Just try not to make your compliments too personal. From the first minute of your meeting, you should not ask your interlocutor which clinic she uses to whiten her teeth (even if, looking at her snow-white smile, you feel an unbearable desire to know the address of this clinic, forgetting about the norms of behavior). But it is worth admiring the aroma of its perfume. We can note a man’s watch or an original tie. Don’t overdo the admiration. Remember the individual rule: a praise from you will be more than enough for each guest.

Another law of gossip is to let people talk about themselves. Listen carefully, ask questions.

– What are your plans for the New Year holidays?

– I’m thinking of going skiing…

– But my love affair with alpine skiing didn’t work out: fall after fall.

When you ask the question, be sure to say something about yourself. Otherwise, the partner will feel uncomfortable: after all, dialogue is better than monologue, and the game should not be played with one goal in mind. And one more thing: be sincere. If the topic of conversation makes you sad, don’t force yourself to seem interested. Change either the subject or the interlocutor.

The chatter shouldn’t last too long. So don’t expect to have a pleasant conversation with just one guest all evening. And you shouldn’t be offended if someone politely walks away shortly after meeting you. These are unwritten rules.

Follow them too. A few minutes after the conversation begins, you may look around and… “notice” your friend: “It was nice to meet you. I hope we see you again.” The same technique can be used to fill an uncomfortable pause in a boring conversation. Well, after saying goodbye, go around the room and propose to someone. Offer to chat !